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Monday, December 14, 2009

Doggie Pool

This morning, I woke up extremely excited I was going round and round in circles, jumping up and down. I was told that I would be staying over with Veronica for a day. I immediately did my poo & wee after my breakfast, I was so excited I couldn’t wait any longer to get out of here; it is no fun staying home alone you know.

Eeiii…. What happened? This is not the normal route to Veronica’s place, we ended up in a place where we had to go through a few human beings, Doofus says they are the most unfriendly security guards, I have no idea what he meant as I am always so friendly with everyone. Suddenly a young man came to our square box, I now know it is called “the car”, I even know how to spell it “C…A…R” see how crever I am.

Doofus called the nice young man “Shem”, he went into the back seat, as the front seat is only for Veronica & me, she always carries me on her lap and I enjoy sticking my head out the window and cleaning my teeth with fresh air, but she is not here now L, Doofus is such an idiot, if he picked up Veronica first I would have had my teeth brushed, now she is going to complain that I have bad breath.

Hey…. We are approaching Veronica’s place, I recognize this route, it is very near and I know I am suppose to be in my carrying bag already. I keep very quiet as darkness is all I can see now…… “Ting” it is that sound again, so I must be there very soon. I heard Veronica’s voice…. Yeh….. I am here!

She unzipped the blue bag and took me to the bathroom, telling me “baby girl, you’re going to be clean clean soon”. Big sigh… am I that dirty, why each time when I see her she has to clean me, can’t she do something else other than cleaning me? I know I didn’t brush my teeth this morning, but that doesn’t mean I am dirty, I just have not brush my teeth yet. It is not my fault; it is all Doofus’s fault.

Anyway…. I am enjoying my hot water shower. Veronica scrubbed me until my whole body was full of bubbles. You do know that dogs do like playing with bubbles, don’t you? They float in the air, silly. I am always so curious why bubbles can fly and always chase them. Oh no, Veronica washed away all my bubbles! Oh No! She is done with my shower already.

Hey…. Not so fast lah, there’s still a bubble in the corner! Sigh… gone. This time I didn’t have to rub myself on the cloth, she carried me in her arms and dried me. Veronica said I am doing a doggie SPA, more pampered then her. What is SPA though? These humans are such strange creatures; always speaking in foreign words that I cannot understand. I must teach them my language so that they can communicate more effectively with me.

Yesterday I had an appointment with my old friend “Ace”. We met at PAWS and he taught me how to growl menacingly at those horny street dogs when they made rude jokes about me being a pedigree girl dog abandoned by my owners. I’m supposed to teach him how to be a pool shark. He plays billiards reasonably well, but for the life of him he cannot learn to call out the pocket before potting the ball.

Doofus videotaped my teaching session and Veron edited it and laid a soundtrack on it so that I can post it here. Be sure to watch it, k?

In the meantime I gotta ask you readers what is a “sale”? Apparently Doofus saw this sale thing in the newspapers and told Veron about it and they both got so excited. Luckily they didn’t circle round and round like me. I mean, they would have looked pretty stupid, right? Humans are just too huge for that kinda thing.

Anyway, back to my story. I only read the sports section in the newspaper. You can ask me anything about Federer, Nadal, Kournikova, Tiger Woods, Beckham or Tevez. But I donno who or what is “Sale”.

Veron and Doofus drove to a place called a Hypermarket and parked in the covered area next to the entrance. They left the windows slightly open and told me to guard the car for a short while.


When they came back an hour later, they laughed like idiots to see me sleeping on the front seat. I mean, hello? What was there to guard? Anybody in their right minds would have stolen a cute little doggie like me and left that rotten car, right? Right? Anyway they seemed happy with me so I didn’t bother to scold them.

They took me to a park and let me loose without my chain. Big mistake. Heh heh heh. I dutifully followed them around for a while before I took off to explore on my own. I pretended I didn’t hear their frantic calls to go back to them.


I had fun running here and there but then I jumped into some muddy grass. Yeeech! That’s when Doofus caught up with me. He was panting and sweating, but he had a huge grin on his face. “Hey! I can somewhat jog again” he told Veron. “I haven’t been able to move fast after the accident. I was so stiff. I must be healing”.

Hmmm. Whatever. They were so happy they didn’t seem to mind the mud on my legs and paws. I’ve told you before, haven’t I? These humans are nice and all, but they can be pretty strange.

Veronica promised me she will bring me a new friend next week, her name is Roseline. Rozy is 8 months old, she is Michelle and Lee’s puppy, they will be in Cyprus for their Christmas holiday, so Rozy will come staying with us for 2 weeks. I can’t wait to meet my new friend. I have to plan our games, as I heard from Veronica, Rozy is very active, and she will disappear under the furniture in a flash if you don't watch her.

I also heard that it was Patrick’s birthday yesterday, and all of them went for Japanese buffet lunch, but they didn’t bring me along. They must have felt bad that they didn’t let me wish Patrick happy birthday, so Doofus came back to pick me up after church, and we went to Patrick’s house.

Veronica went there to pick up a huge piece of wood that is 4 times my size, strange looking piece of wood with metal strings, it makes sounds. I didn’t see pesky there this time, his name is Bao Bao, he was chasing after me the last time we went for movie in Patrick’s place, I was so afraid of him I ran to Veronica and she had to carry me on her lap throughout the whole movie, yet he was still trying to jump up and get me.

More stories later. A big wet *woof* for now.



Friday, October 23, 2009

Saturday 17th October

I was lying around in my cage at PAWS feeling sorry for myself. I was three and a half years old, and what a sorry state my life was in. For a society that called itself “Animal Lovers” Malaysians certainly were not very animal friendly.


Since I had been abandoned by my owners for my skin disease, I had been caged up here and left pretty much to myself. Yes, they did feed me boiled rice and a little bit of cheap spare part meat but I was dirty and unwashed.

I had to wee wee and poo poo in my cage in full view of the other dogs. Not very ladylike, let me assure you. The male dogs would bark lustily at me and wink at each other knowingly. *sheesh*

The people at PAWS would hose down my cage once a day. I was given medicine for my skin rash, a condition called Demodex. I had to resort to biting my own front paws to ease the itchiness until I lost all my beautiful white fur and my skin turned red and swollen. I was dirty and I stank to high heaven.

So you can imagine my surprise when an old and balding Punjabi guy came with a Chinese girl and actually paid RM300 to bail me out of jail. I mean, I didn’t know them from Adam! And I was brought up as a proper lady – I wouldn’t follow any Tom, Dave or Harry home just for RM300, now would I?

It looked like I didn’t have any choice in the matter as this guy just literally picked me and held me tight to his chest and took me into his strange metal box with four wheels which moved very fast. The Chinese girl was in control of the machine and from what I could observe in that short time I deduced that she was his master as he listened patiently to her and obeyed all her commands.

Very soon the metal box stopped moving and I was smuggled into a knapsack and taken into another metal box but this one moved upwards instead of forwards. I heard a *Ding! Eight Floor* and then we were in a nicely furnished condo unit. The Chinese girl said “Shh! Good Doggie. You don’t bark, ah? Dogs are not allowed in this condo.”

I thought to myself “Hello! Is that my problem? You bloody dognapped me and smuggled me in here!” but then I took a good look at her and then I looked at the poor hen pecked Punjabi guy and then I looked back at her and she looked kinda fierce so I decided to keep quiet.

The next thing I knew I was in a small room and the Girl was bathing me with warm water and shampoo while the Guy held me gently to prevent me from shaking the water off. He washed the insides of my ears which were black and smelly with earwax.

Then they rinsed me and bathed me again with a mild antiseptic solution. I could hear the skin eating mites scream as the antiseptic hit them. MMmmm! That felt good. I didn’t struggle as I was enjoying myself. I liked to be clean. Maybe these two cartoon characters were not so bad after all.


I was gently towel dried and then the Girl gave me my first fur trim in a long time. “Aiyoh, you poor thing, your hair is all tangled and matted up” she said. Ah, finally someone who understands that I am a lady. She’s not bad at all, I thought, even though she didn’t use proper doggie scissors and obviously had zero fur trimming experience. Still, I didn’t look half bad.

My only problem so far was that they kept calling me “Dawn” when my name was “Lucinda”. Can’t really blame them when the guy at PAWS couldn't give them my history. I was to learn the meaning behind my name later.

After my bath I found out that the guy had actually bought a combination food and water dish, a leather collar, shampoo, dry dog food and a leash for walkies before even before collecting me. Of course the collar didn’t fit. I’m toy sized and the Doofus had bought a mid-sized one. Yeah, I think I’ll call him Doofus even though he’s extremely nice and gentle with me.

I was then smuggled back into the fast moving forward box and taken to a park. Oh what joy! Oh what freedom after so long in the smelly cage at PAWS. I ran here. I ran there. I smelled everything. After a short while a Chinese guy named Patrick came with his dog Jeannie and joined us. Jeannie was a Maltese just like me but she was mixed and double my size.

We quickly became friends and Jeannie told me that my humans were softies when it came to us canines. Good to know, mwahahahah! Time to revive my plans for world domination. She also told me not to let them know that I understand human-speak. After some time frolicking in the park we went to the Punj…I mean Doofus’ house nearby and he fed me some of the dry dog food.

I can get used to this sort of pampering. They sat at the dinner table and yadda yaddaed. I heard him telling the Chinese girl that it was strange that I never barked at all as I drifted off to dreamland. Three hours later I woke up with a start and vomited. And vomited.

And vomited all night until morning. Of course Doofus got worried and started searching for a nearby Vet’s number. I wanted to tell him that it was the dry dog food – I couldn’t digest it after eating soft boiled rice for so long, but I was too sick to talk to him.

The next day when I felt better, the two of them explained to me that I was supposed to be put to sleep and that they had rescued me on my last day. They actually gave me a new dawn, thereby my name.

Sunday 18th October 2009

The next day, Sunday, Doofus actually missed church to look after me. Aww that was so sweet of him. He sat with me and gently petted me and told me that his name was Dave and that he was a high flying corporate man until he crashed his Harley and went into a coma and lost everything – his job as a General Manager, his fiancĂ©e, his health, his eyesight.

He was bedridden for eight months and couldn’t move and couldn’t see. He had a lot of time to reflect on his wayward lifestyle and he confided in me that he felt that he had been given a second chance at life and that he would get it right this time. He also told me that he was` a Christian and that I should be one as well.


Meanwhile this German Shepherd was at our front gate smelling around and I barked and barked until he ran away. Doofu..I mean Dave looked so happy and proud of me. Then he explained to me that he called me “Dawn” because I too, just like him, had been given a second chance at life. Just as I was getting all emotional and teary-eyed, he abandoned me all alone in his house and ran off to church to meet his friends for some sort of discussion.


I think he said it had something to do with taking a bunch of orphans somewhere. Hey! Whattabout me? I’m an orphan too!


He came back later with the Chinese girl, Veronica, who cooked me a delicious meal of chicken breast, potatoes, carrots and cauliflower. Yum! Now that’s what I call food. Dave then took me for a walk around the neighborhood and I noticed that there were quite a lot of doggies in the area. By now I was feeling much better and wanted to make friends but he wouldn’t let me go near them.


So I sat in the house and stared at the neighbour's cat. She stared right back at me. Come to think of it she looks a lot like her owner. *Meeyow*


Monday 19th October 2009

I went for walkies with Dave in the morning and did my wee wee at various spots to mark my territory. Gotta show these Bandar Kinrara dogs who’s boss. Then he heated up my healthy gourmet doggy meal and made me wait till it completely cooled down before I could eat it.


After eating, I circled clockwise continuously to let him know that I needed to poo poo but he just laughed at me and called me a silly dog. I just might change your name to “circular” he grinned. I tried one last time – I circled anti-clockwise to let him know that I couldn’t hold it any longer and then I proceeded to poo pood into my food bowl.

The smile left his face as he grabbed me and put me on a pile of newspapers that he had put in a corner of the bathroom. “Bad dog! Bad Dawn! Bad girl!” he kept scolding me. “Poo poo here on the newspapers”. What! On the newspapers? Is he mad? But I had told him, hadn’t I? It’s not my fault if he’s illiterate in doggy-speak. Maybe I should send him to obedience school. He seemed pretty obedient to Veronica. She must have trained him well. She and I definitely need to talk about him.

He left me alone again in the house for a few hours and when he returned he had bought me two doggy beds from Ikea. One for his house and one for Veronica’s place. At night I fell asleep on my new Ikea bed. I like this life so far.

Tuesday 20th October 2009



I woke up in the morning and waited for Dave to take me for walkies. So I can’t understand why he got upset when I wee weed on the bedroom floor when he said to get ready because we were going for walkies. I swear, I will never understand men.


In the afternoon he fed me lunch and Veronica came and complained that I was very smelly and they bathed me again. Then she left.


Later in the evening he fed me dinner and tried to put me in the car to go to Patrick’s place but I was struggling so much he put his car keys on the seat and picked me up and put me in the car and closed the door with a satisfied smile. Click! The car doors locked. Man! You should have seen his face. He really panicked.


Well the doofus tried opening all the doors and then he called Patrick to get a locksmith and to tell him to hurry because his dog was trapped in the car and the air might run out. Then he tapped on the window and told me not to panic because he would break the window and rescue me if the air ran out. Haiya, so much drama.


Anyway, Patrick and his daughter came, the locksmith came after 20 minutes and took 2 seconds to open the car door then we all went to Patrick’s house. Man! I like this place. Besides Jeannie, I met two other doggies - Cookie and Nina. I ran here. I ran there. I met the nice Mrs Patrick and her daughter Sidney. I smelled everything in the house. I got bored. I fell asleep.


Later Veronica came and joined us and I followed her home to her house and slept on my other new Ikea bed.